Taking a break from sex….why it is OK

S. Anderson had no idea that a break from sex could end up nourishing her wellbeing and relationship when she and her partner decided on one last year. During a very stressful time in her professional life, Anderson noticed that her interest in sex had dwindled to a standstill.

“When I searched around for information on sex and stress, I saw a lot of stuff about how common [lowered libido amid stress] was, but mostly with tips for still making it happen,” she said. “When a therapist asked me if I had considered not having sex for a while, or at least not the full-on [penetrative] kind, it sounded relieving.”

At first, the notion of discussing such a break with her partner brought more angst, she said, adding that “her interest in sex while I didn’t want it was already making me more stressed out” and she “definitely felt ashamed.” But when she brought it up, her partner was fully supportive. “He didn’t even flinch,” Anderson noted. “I was surprised that it was such a non-issue… He listened and I felt really seen.”

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